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We played a mystical game in the yard when I was 5-6 years old , in the 90s. The main idea of the game was to call any hero to own dream at the night. We did a certain ritual and invocation.
I remember how I wished to see God in my dream.
And that night in a dream I found myself in a tropical country and in front of me was a huge, a beautiful gold statue . I looked at the statue and I felt that it was a God.
There was no one in the dream.
It was me and only my thoughts. The name sounded in my head: «This is Buddha.» The next morning, I surprised my parents. I said that in a dream I saw God — his name is Buddha. At that time, there was only one Russian channel on TV. It was not used to broadcast about
Buddha. Parents rarely talked about God. When I asked about Buddha, they wondered how I knew about him.
Dad was a truck driver and brought books and encyclopedias from Moscow and Europe. Dad opened the encyclopedia for me and showed me the statues. He said that maybe I saw it. This was my first request to the universe and the answer made me happy. Later in the first class, a classmate gave me a Bible in Kazakh language . After reading it, I used to put the book in front of me on my parents’ bed and sat down on my knees and prayed.
In the 7th class in kung fu, I first encountered the fact that we were chanting some of the Lao Tzu sutras. We went to the monastery, looked at the fire for a long time. I didn’t know that it was meditation. We worked with 5 elements. Developed concentration and intuition. They broke stones with one blow. We trained 3 times a day. And every day they prayed at the hand-made altars at the morning and at the night.
Now it is interesting to observe my past time and underline that I was looking for God from early childhood.
Due to the fact that this question was in my heart, I often asked how people come to God. I was lonely in my path, there was no one to talk about this topic with in 90-s and after. Later, my childhood searches, love of concentration and watching fire made me fall in love with
yoga.
Of course, it should be noted that my soul has accumulated enough suffering from external karma. Subconsciously I had a question how to cleanse my heart after destructive consequences, how not to lose my concentration. Above mentioned question arises because my close friends or even family members used to involved of their manipulations or the swing of the pendulum. And while you sort things out with
everyone, you can lose the essence of yoga, the path to the Creator.
I looked for various ways to keep my mental content from being filled with other people’s thoughts. I usually went into solitude, into a hermit. But later I realized that communication and building healthy relationships with people are the fruits of yoga.
Through meditation, I learned to clear my mind and return to my drishti, so Chapter 6 is closer to me. And through meditation I feel the presence of God. If I stayed in the desert, I would practice and meditate all my free time.
For instance after reading Yoga Sutra by Edwin F. Bryant I understood that every soul is pure. He describes in his book: “ To illustrate the nature of soul as pure consciousness alone, devoid content, the commentators often refer to the example of pure crystal. When a red flower is placed next to a crystal, the flower’s color is reflected in the crystal, and so the crystal itself appears to be red. Later I read Yoga Sutra by B.K.S. Iyengar he gave the same example but with lens.
I wish to lead to that I was always looking for God. But I always was involved to people reaction. Then I have been avoiding people for two years. And I spent time for reading. But I found that every soul is pure. They used to be involved for gossip, intrigue. All destructive habits left own color like red flower. Once I understood it, I stop judge everyone and avoid them. I found a way how disconnect with my ego & mind. The whole art of meditation aims to separate consciousness from the phenomenal world with which it has identified itself, to curb the senses that have trapped it, and to purify it until it can fully channel the light of the soul.
The Bhagavad Gita gives a way how to purify the mind and how after long experience of mediation we see the pure soul. Words 12, 16, 25 & 29: Make your mind one-pointed in meditation, and your heart will be purified. Arjuna, those who eat too much or eat too little, who sleep too much or sleep to little , will succeed in meditation.
Little by little, through patience and repeated effort, the mind become stilled in the self. They see the Self in every creature and all creation in the Self. With consciousness unified through meditation, they see everything with an equal eye. I see my body as 5 koshas:anamayakosha, pranamayakosha, manamayakosha, vijnanamayakosha, anandamayakosha.
When I meditate for more than an hour, my mental body calms down and makes it possible to switch to alpha waves or theta waves, or … as in the yoga sutras it is described in the state of Svapna, Shushupti.
It seems to me that my prana body connects to the intellect body, where I learn patience, acceptance, freedom, gratitude, high vibrations and feelings of support, the presence of God, his patronage. After meditation I have space between emotion and consciousness. It is a nice platform to communicate of all being .
The shloka “Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu” become my lighthouse of the day.
